Thursday, May 17, 2007
i miss hanging out...not just da pham. haha, but i haven't really hung out with my best friends lately..
it's always jamming, then bye. go do out own things.. everyone's so busy.
it's been a while since ben, bona, wilson ong and i just gone out do do stupid things.
and a verly long time since i've like.. just.. wasted time away with choooooo.. like walking around, following pretty girl. HAHA.. school ends so late all the time.. and the assignments non stop..
gone were the days where we all would just go, "eh i feel like jamming lei.. ya ya.. fuck work lah! go home then do! or tml go sch copy! hahahahaha!!" haha..really fun lah..
now everything is so serious.. i'm actully happy that it's very serious now, cuz like i know we're heading some where and with a goal in mind(as a band). but i'm afraid we get too serious and loose focus on the ultimate thing as to why we wanna play music - cuz we love it. I really just wanna have a good time playing music. And yeah i noe that playing well as a band makes that possible.. i just hope we don't get too caught up in proffessional. but STILL, i wanna be proffessional. haha. hard to say, but i guess some will get what i mean.
i hope elleness will practice the songs well enough to play it without the mp3. this way confirm when we jam, no problem.i'll be revising the song's tml..
i think i rant alot. HAHA.
i think it's nice to have someone where u can just talk talk talk about anything and everything, without that person giving u weird faces or gestures that indicate your talking crap and that they can't be bothered.. i think it's tiring to talk to such people. haa.. i can't be myself.. i dunno.. i think i cant stand people who try to run away from who they are..
i mean, if you're not it. you're not it. if you're it, your it.
i dunno if sometimes i cross into that category of people i can't stand; which sometimes i think i do.. but i just hope that it hasn't happened often enough for me to end up being somebody else.
cuz if you ask me, the simplest people, are the nicest ones.
and what i mean by simple is not how simple their life is. so, what,like then those people with broken family, girlfriend break up, the grand mother always scold and they no money people (complicated life), cannot be nice people meh?
if you ask me, these are kind of like.. the really nice ones. although occasionally, some others use it as an excuse to do ridiculous things.
but i mean that like, the simple character people.(pardon my horrible phrasing. i can't really do engllsh right now. can't be bothered, and i'm not good at it to start with.) they dress who they are, they talk and do who they are, and they're just.. there, and no where else. So if i'm hanging out with them, i KNOW i'm hanging out with them, and not some other guy, and then i have to try to BE that kind of guy and ahh i dunno lah..
if u read up to here, i kow tow to you. haha. not cuz i's long. but because.. what i'm writing is so damn bloodie confusing. i don even really understand what i'm typing, but i understand what i WANT to type. HAHA..
anyways, basically, i miss hanging out with my friends..
sometimes i find that i'm quite a loner. HAHA. okok..
i think i shall leave that for another day.. or maybe i shud just sun bian write lah.. since it's so darn difficult for me to gather the energy to log in and blog..
yah.. loner. HAHA.. yeahh.. like.. i was thinking that u noe when u think of someone, then there is this other someone you'd think of.. eg, when i think of warren, the other someone is cheryl. then fiona, yumi. ain, aidah etc...
i thnk of me.. haha i dunno who lei.. wilson lah. yah lah.. but.. i was kinda imagining just in design sch la..hahaha.
i noe it's not like important or what but..it's getting very irritating when my parents keep silently forcing me to eat at home everytime by comming to school early to pick me up..
i also think that i think too much. hahaha. but i like it. i think that thnking is very good. because it stimulates the brain and helps me see many different options and outcomes and approaches and all that fcked up crap. haha.. i mean like, sometimes, i get quite annoyed when people just don't want to think... ok anyways. back to me and my mr lonely. haha.
no lah i noe i'm not lonely. and i'm going to regret typing this. hahaha. please don't come up to me and say things like "oh i'm here. i'm your friend" hahahahahahaha.. i noe i got friends lah. i very happy. cuz i got DAMN nice friends in design! and irreplacable good ol best friends from my sec sch.. i don't have alot.but i'd say quality over quantity, ANYDAY. so noooo, i'm not emoing. haha. if you ever wanted to noe what goes on in my brain, ya this is what goes on. hahahaha. can die rite. maybe thats why my head so big. hahah...
well. actually theres alot alot more. but i dun want to say only.. cuz. somethings are better left unsaid, but known. =) (so yeah.. they're good things)
you know which days i miss the most(in design)?
1st: the original pham-in-the-studio days.
2nd: leadership module days..
i never felt stupid(like actually stupid), although i act stupid alot, during those days..
the best part about the studio days were.. u dun nid to plan to meet up. u just GO there. and ee who's there. and there is ALWAYS, like always.. someone from da pham there, or going there.. now.. it's so seperated. =( want to hang out also so difficult..
and oh one last time i want to say. i may say some things about dempster, but honestly, i think he's a very nice guy. i think you can talk to him about anything, and he'll try to make you feel good. he may not succeed, but i guess he tries. i'm just kinda sad for him cuz i feel that he tries very hard to impress or tickle(make ppl laugh), to the extent that it sounds weird or he does weird things.. like sometimes, when he does something totally from his heart, it's actually pretty funny and not weird at all.. i just hope that one day he'll see that that's all he needs; himself.
wahlau.. i think i keep talking about the same thing sia..anyways, i think da pham is getting kinda big. we really REALLY shud just hang out as DA pham for a day or two. that'll be nice...
i actually blogged at 12:07 AM
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